Infertility Tests – wands, needles & fishy dye

I scheduled my initial round of infertility tests as soon as I could, but due to work commitments and travel back to the UK for Christmas the tests ran over two more cycles.  Over December 14 and January 15 I had a vaginal ultrasound, cycle day 3 blood work and HSG.  Chris booked his sperm analysis in January.

Vaginal Ultrasound. An ultrasound wand was placed in my vagina to check if I had follicles in my ovaries.  And I had many!  The ultrasound also showed that I was just about to ovulate from my left ovary (which is the ovulation pain I had been feeling earlier that day – it’s nice to know that I can tell which ovary I am ovulating from!!).  The doctor confirmed everything looked healthy and normal. Woohoooo!

Cycle Day 3 blood work.  I was horrified at the amount of boxes that had been ticked on the blood paper work….I calculated at least 4 vials of blood.  I am not good with needles.  I cannot bear to look at them without feeling faint.  Just before I deployed to Iraq I had to ensure all my vaccinations were up to date (all four million of them).  The army nurse asked me how I wasDani thought with needles.  I replied ‘not particularly good’.  He said ‘well now is the time to overcome your fear, I’ll tell you when you can look away’, and then immediately proceeded to jab me four times, after he just laughed, ‘see?  I told you would overcome your fear!’.  I walked away dizzy and attempted to find the toilet to be sick.  I also have donated blood once, and passed out after giving 1/2 a pint.  Apparently even when I voluntarily want to give my blood away my body won’t let me!  This time, for these particular blood tests, the nurse was lovely (despite him coming to the conclusion that I ultimately kill people for a living), he put me at ease straight away.

A big difference between the UK and the US, is that here in the US it is possible to get your blood test results online before your doctor sees them and discusses what they actually mean.  I am not a doctor and I can barely pronounce the name of the tests, so using the internet to help me decipher the results was a TERRIBLE idea!  In the UK you call up your doctor and then a receptionist will tell you if the results were normal or you need to book an appointment.  I am not sure which way round I prefer!!  Anyway, my results were normal.

Hysterosalpingogram also known as a HSG.  I’m not sure any human being would want to have this test performed out of choice. This procedure is where dye is injected through the vagina into the uterus and by using x-rays to see if the fallopian tubes are blocked. I was given an information sheet about the procedure, I felt prepared, and took the 800mg of Ibuprofen as prescribed an hour before.  My friend accompanied me as it recommended that you have someone drive you home afterwards. I am very pleased she was there with me, I couldn’t have gone it alone.

I was a bit nervous, naturally, but it wasn’t until the nurse asked me ‘Are you familiar with the procedure?’, I said, ‘yes, I read up’.  The nurse looked a little worried ‘uhoh you haven’t been reading the internet have you?’.  Now that part made me nervous!  I had not thought to look up the procedure online because the info sheet given to me was sufficiently detailed.

The procedure was very uncomfortable, and painful at parts, it felt like my insides were on fire and I had immediate cramping.  I could just about see the screen with the x-rays on it and could make out that my tubes were flowing freely.  Great news!!!! But the doctor asked me ‘did you know you have a retroverted uterus‘? Nope, no I did not know that.  Well everyday is a school day after all.   The only question I had on my mind at that point, was  what does all of these results really mean?  What will Chris’s results be?  I felt sad and guilty that Chris would be feeling more pressure about his sperm analysis.

Google – Jekyll & Hyde?  After my final test, I went home intrigued, and googled “HSG”.  I am so glad I did not read any forums before going for this procedure, there are some sad and terrifying stories out there.  The nurse was right to look so worried.  A lesson was certainly learned here – I’m going to  keep trusting in the people I am paying lots of money for to look after me.  Maybe I’m being naive, but google isn’t always your friend.

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