I have a long list of things I should never have googled whilst on this great pudding club hunt. And there are equally as many things not to google whilst in the pudding club, especially on your Friday lunch break…one being ‘pre-term labour IVF’.
Like many IVF related research, the evidence is unclear or poor. But generally, there is a theory that IVF babies are more likely to go into pre term labour. Now how much more likely, I dont know.
I don’t want to worry myself about this stuff because really, it is still very unlikely. But today I caught myself feeling anxious about what I was reading. Some of my anxiety is caused by my lack of weight gain. What if I am not eating enough? What if my baby isn’t growing enough? Am I risking my baby’s life? Although the doctor told me earlier this week at my routine check up, as long as I AM actually eating and not puking, then we won’t worry about it until my 20 week scan when in 2.5 weeks time to see how much Rocky had grown. Every morning I get on the scales and I am not getting heavier…just the normal fluctuations I have always had.
Understanding my concerns about this Chris reminded me to finish my plate of food last night… But I just couldn’t eat anymore of it! So I need to tell myself to listen to the doctor and stop worrying about it for now.
Easier said than done!
And another thing I quickly wanted to mention as I was stupidly googling things I shouldn’t….. is how I noted the lack of research studies that separate out IVF and ICSI patients. Apart from my post on my Brussels experience, my top post that gets hits consistently is the one about the ethics of ICSI. It doesn’t surprise me because I discovered very little about ICSI and hence why I wrote about it. I mean, there is definitely something very unnatural about one sperm being selected by a doctor rather than ‘natural selection’ (nothing natural about IVF though either!) There has to be implications of this human intervention???!
The Great Pudding Club Hunt 
Kevin and I get into HUGE fights every time we talk about the implications of human intervention in fertility. So we try to avoid it altogether. I’m sure you are gaining weight just fine, and baby will be just fine, and everything will be just fine! It’s hard to believe that until they are here, though. Keep chugging away. Every day is a victory.
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Glad to hear everything is going well! I drank ensure to help with weight gain – it doesn’t taste the best but I was able to drink a few extra calories when it seemed like all food made me sick!
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Yeah I’ve got a post coming out this weekend it’s going to talk about all the crap I was given by one particular Midwife about the dangers of giving birth after IVF, which I found after a lot of research are pretty much unfounded ( and that came from a midwife which just blew my mind as all the other Midwife I know are very chill). One of the biggest things that they say or that IVF mothers are at greater risk of delivering a stillborn, so I went out and researched what the actual numbers were, and the difference was .4% compared to .8% of all births. Fear-mongering I tell ya. Just like when getting IVF, there’s a whole bunch of Scare Tactics out there are designed to tell us that we’re never going to be able to deliver a baby without massive interventions.
And yeah anybody who wants to fight me on the right to do what I choose with my body, particularly when it comes to reproduction or preventing it, can bite me.
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My MFM also told us about these higher pre term risks for IVF patients. Ugh. It sucks, I guess u just never stop worrying.
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Bless you – the worrying never ends does it?!?
I don’t know much about the IVF preterm labour situation, but in terms of weight gain I only gained about a stone in my entire pregnancy and was convinced that I should have been bigger, but all docs said its fine and baby appeared at a normal weight, so I wouldn’t panic too much. And don’t force yourself to eat, you’ll just feel sick if you do!
Just take it day by day – that’s my advice. I could never think too far ahead/about too many things, just tried to get through each day and not stress too much – definitely easier said than done I know! Will be thinking of you 🙂 xx
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For myself, I actually lost weight the first few months of pregnancy. I’ve only gained 7lbs total so far, and I’m almost to 27 weeks. I used to freak out about it constantly…until I found out at my first anatomy scan that baby girl is measuring about a week ahead of schedule. I still sometimes wonder if I’m gaining like I should, even though I know as an overweight woman that I’m not supposed to gain too much at all…but still, it weighs on your brain! I would say that if your Dr isn’t worried, you should try to trust his judgement and not worry either. Hope your scan goes well!
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The worrying never ends! You think when you FINALLY get pregnant you’ll be calmer…then you think when you finally see the heartbeat…then when you finally get through 1st trimester…then when you finally feel a kick…etc. Step away from Dr Google though, as I’m sure many others have said before, it’s mostly the bad news stories that get talked about (highly hypocritical as I spent all day yesterday googling things…do as I say, not as I do!).
Try not to worry about the weight gain. I’ve had the opposite problem (29 weeks in and I have gained 35lbs!) and have heard any number of stories of people say “I gained 10lbs throughout my pregnancy and everything was fine” or equally “I gained 70lbs and everything was fine”.
x x x
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I agree with those above me! The worrying truly never ends. 9 months from now you will be worrying if baby is getting enough breastmilk (should that be the route you choose/are able to take), if baby is growing enough, etc. I hear it ALL the time from the moms around me, even those without a history of infertility/IVF and even when their doctors tell them that everything is going FINE. I’m going to give you some tough love and tell you that you have the option to choose to stress about this or to let it go. And honestly, the worry is not doing you any good. It doesn’t change what you are doing or how you are doing it anyway, so what is the point?
Easier said then done, I know. But with some things, it is best just to push aside the fear and worry in situations that you cannot control. I had to do this with the surrogacy as there was literally nothing I could do from day to day for the good of the baby, and stressing about what Elle was doing could have seriously affected our relationship. I saw others that tried to micromanage their surros or that drove themselves crazy with the worry, and it did no one any good. In the end, I had made the choice to trust this woman with my most precious gift and I had to give up what I did not have control of. It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do, but it was necessary for the sanity of everyone involved.
You are naturally small and baby may just be small like mommy. As long as the doctor is okay with how things are progressing and you continue to maintain a healthy diet, there is no reason to drive yourself crazy. Allow yourself the freedom to let it go.
Of course, you can find anecdotal evidence for eeeeverything, but Ross is an ICSI baby and was literally born on his due date! Since IVF is being regularly practiced, preterm labor can’t be such an enormous risk that treatment is considered unsafe. And even IF baby is born a little early, it is not the worst thing ever. Kyle was in the 2lb range at birth with no residual health problems– and that was 30 years ago!
Just breathe. Take one step at a time. Little by little, you will get closer to the day that you have that baby in your arms. 💗
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