hemorrhoids – The Great Pudding Club Hunt

PC Diary @ 32W 6D

For some reason I have had little reminders of the Brussels airport terror attacks…perhaps it is because it is my last transatlantic flight before I go on maternity leave…or perhaps it is my hormone overloaded glass cage of emotions more as I get closer to R-Day*. I get very brief moments of re-experiencing events of that day. The feeling of my heart in my mouth, the feeling of not knowing if I will see Chris again, the feeling of the heat from the blast run over the back of my head, the feeling of the aches from all the shaking and shivering. These thoughts have been fleeting as my eyes well up with tears for just a moment, but then I get a kick or a contraction and I remember where I am now and where my near future will be, the tears don’t flow and I move on in my thoughts.

I am very excited to not have any more work travels ahead of me, I think flying transatlantic at almost 33 weeks is a little too much for me. First of all, I got the all clear from the doc to fly to Luxembourg this week, however, I didn’t know that flying with British Airways they would want a doctor’s note to say I am fit to fly after 28 weeks pregnant. Whoops. I discovered this the day I was die to fly. American is who I normally fly with, they don’t need anything until 36 weeks so I didn’t think to check the third leg of my flight would be OK. So I wore my black baggy sweater and didn’t do up my big black coat…you could only tell I was pregnant if I waddled or stood with my bump out. I managed to hide it both ways and no one noticed I was pregnant and I was never asked for a doctor’s note! Phew! Got away with that one. I had read online of women who had been turned away for not having a note when flying with BA.

Secondly, because of what happened last time I flew, I have been conscious of all contractions, pains, and strange bodily behaviours as potential indicators of labour. I had several nights of terrible sleep because I couldn’t get comfortable in the hotel bed, the pillows and mattress were terrible…and one night I got the shivers, shakes and bad upset stomach, as if I was coming down with either the flu or had food poisoning. I was exhausted after several nights of bad sleep. I started to worry that Rocky might be suffering…although she has been extremely active the past week. She has definitely shifted head further down and legs up. If I am not lying down or sitting laid back I can feel her pushing down a lot more into my pelvis and my poor bladder is suffering. Also, my hemorrhoids have got worse, they haven’t burst (fortunately), but they have got bigger and sorer as I had constipation followed by upset tummy. Quite frankly my bum is totally fed up with my bowels!!!!

So that is all my negative thoughts for the day. Now for some more of the positive to keep balanced….

My travels took me briefly to the UK with two layovers at London Heathrow meaning I got to see my parents, brothers (one of whom is about to turn 18!!! OH MY how did that happen??!) and a friend. I was reminded of all things British and Christmas! I love all Christmassy food and drinks! I know it’s quite a way away, but I felt festive. Rocky was also spoilt with some lovely gifts, my bag barely closed!

I discovered Le Tote! A little late….but it is a great source of maternity clothes. I think I will write a separate post about this because it is well worth explaining some more why I like it.

32 weeks 3 days

*Rocky’s expected delivery due date!

Rocky – keep baking in there please!!!

For some reason I always had it in my head that I wanted to be married before I turned 30. I don’t really know why, but it was some kind of milestone. Perhaps I thought I might turn into a pumpkin or something horrifying and wrinkly on my thirtieth birthday if I hadn’t gotten married by then. 30 simply seemed like a pretty scary age to reach. I can’t remember if I ever told Chris this at the time….but we did get married when I was 29. Phew! It was actually more about coincidence than any secret desire to not get married in my thirties. Well 30 came and went and it was just another year like any other. I know, I’m weird. It shouldn’t make a difference.

Anyway…I digress… I am now THIRTY weeks pregnant, and this same number seems equally as scary. For me, entering the third trimester wasn’t the scary part – it was entering my 30th week of pregnancy! And to top it off, I have been travelling for work when I hit this milestone. When I am travelling on my own I have waaaaay too much time to think deeply about life and what the future holds. And that is dangerous! It doesn’t help that October is Pregnancy and infancy loss month and I have read MANY stories of women losing their babies. I have seriously gone through a whole box of tissues this month.

Plus there has been a lot of discussion after the third presidential debate where Trump and Clinton discussed abortion, particularly on late term abortion. These issues have really connected with me emotionally, where ordinarily it wouldn’t – perhaps it is just the hormones thinking too much! I have blogged about how it took me a while to not be in denial over this pregnancy and to accept it, so I hadn’t really thought about the outcome of this pregnancy and how scary everything can seem until now. It was really around week 27/28 when Chris and I started to seriously prepare for Rocky’s arrival that I have started to truly embrace this pregnancy and fall in love with her, so I feel there is even more to lose with this recent strong emotional attachment I’ve developed to the little pudding I am baking in my uterus. I guess this week has been when I have started to truly worry about how this child birth thing is going to go down! But I know that it is natural to worry for most woman who are approaching child birth for their first time (and in fact I will hazard a guess that it is equally worrying for any subsequent pregnancy!).

Getting ready. We have been busy bunnies – knowing our diaries were getting pretty full over the next few weeks we decided to get all the basics ready for Rocky’s arrival. The weekend of Hurricane Matthew we made all our big purchases –

Strollers/buggies (one jogger, one ‘umbrella’ lightweight style) which all ‘click and connect’ to a car seat. I think they call it a ‘travel system’. Wow choosing a stroller is intense! It was perhaps easier than choosing a new car (Although I suspect Chris would argue otherwise with my multi-criteria analysis for buying my car!!). We chose the Graco Modes Jogger Travel System (bah which I have just noticed on sale) and Graco Breaze Click Connect Umbrella Stroller.
Pack n Play – this is basically a travel play pen/cot/changing table/bassinett system. It even has a a vibrating chair and a mobile with music. Very cool. Who knows if it will be practical?!?! We went with the Graco Pack n Playard Nearby Napper.
The Layette. We went to a few consignment/second hand baby clothing stores/boutiques and bought the basics to get us started. Burp clothes, muslins, sleep suits, sleep sacks, socks, onesies, a few adorable outfits, swaddles, baby health care stuff. And yes, we did actually buy some clothes from the boys section.
Baby video monitor. This one completely overwhelmed me. There were so many different choices. In the end we chose one based off reviews online because how else do you choose these days?
Baby Carrier/ Sling. We had a bit of fun trying these all on in babies r us. We tried to find one that suited both Chris and I…basically it is one big long piece of cloth right? You would think it is easy to choose a sling! Well ummmm no. We went with the Moby Wrap Evolution Baby Carrier in DENIM! Oh yes the colour is very important of course ;-p
A diaper Genie! Basically a diaper/nappy bin. Do we really need one? Apparently so!
Diaper/nappy bag. Sooooo many different choices – rucksack/back pack/messenger back/giant purse! Colours, fabrics, goodies, flaps and sections inside.
Nursery. We have almost finished the nursery, we are just waiting on a few items to arrive that we ordered from http://www.thelandofnod.com (wow they have some adorable stuff – at an extortionate price too!) The majority of the furniture we bought from ikea or is second hand. So this meant we could splash out on some of the decor items – such as the wall decals.

I love these decals and rug!!!

Pregnancy woes. I have been lucky with my pregnancy so far, so I guess it is expected that the last trimester will have a few woes, I can’t escape lightly.

Vaccine OUCHIE. I’ve already written about the side effects of the TDAP vaccine!! That took several days before it wore off! But I survived, that is the most important thing.
Turning into a Whale overnight. I am struggling with getting out of our bed – I have to roll off the edge and clamber back in with a lot of huffing and puffing – it’s a platform bed so it’s not easy to get in or out at the moment, I may need a ladder soon and I suspect this is only going to get worse over the next few weeks!
The smallest bladder in the world. Which means I rarely sleep more than three hours in a row, maybe two or three times a week I might get three hours of sleep.
Hemorrhoids. The past few weeks my poo has slowed down to one a day (from three a day) and this has meant that I am now also suffering from hemorrhoids. They are literally a pain in the arse! I am afraid of them bursting and bleeding suddenly and freaking me out that the blood is from somewhere else!

Some mild relief from Hemorrhoids 😦

Anemia. I had a follow up blood test after my initial results came back as slightly anemic during my 24 week appointment. At my 28 week appointment my results just came back to say I am still anemic despite taking iron supplements. But the cause remains unknown because my iron stores are good. So! More blood tests! Perhaps I’m actually anemic because they keep stealing my blood for all these tests 😦 In the meantime I have been told to keep taking my iron supplements (YEY these cause even more constipation which I am trying to combat with fibre supplements) and of course my prenatals (which I have been religiously taking for almost three years now!).

Other exciting things whilst we countdown to R-Day (i.e. Rocky’s arrival!).

Maternity leave planning. I get 20 weeks of maternity leave. In addition I have normal annual leave to take, home leave (where I get to fly back with my family to the UK for 2 weeks) and normal holidays such as Christmas, Easter etc all to account for. My last day in the office will be 4 weeks before the expected R-Day, so 2nd December will be my last day! This means I only have 2 weeks in the office because the rest of the time I am either travelling or training! Whaaat?!! How am I going to keep myself occupied for those 4 weeks?! Well I have my Executive Development Program work to get ahead on before Rocky arrives. Plus I have some knitting to do 🙂 I guess you might see me write a few more blog posts! And we are still writing our book on infertility for friends and family. Plenty to keep me relaxed.
Maternity photo shoot. Although Chris will probably take some maternity photos of me, he can’t do photos of the both of us easily, so we decided to hire a photographer. I selected 6 local photographers, and of course let Chris decide which one to go with as he is the pro! Naturally, he picked the most expensive one ;-p We paid our deposit and selected our location, so the photo shoot will be in a couple of weeks time! All we have to do now is figure out what to wear!
Travelling to Europe. I have two more work trips to fit in….Bavaria, Germany and Luxembourg City, Luxembourg. I love love love Bavaria at this time of year – the colours in the mountains are simply amazing! And I am excited to be going to Luxembourg because I have never been before.

My 30 week bump flying to Germany- and the plane’s seatbelt JUST fits round it! I hope next time I fly I don’t have to ask for an extender belt :-s

Nesting. You may recall we bought a new house earlier this year. We have been slowly fixing things, decorating etc. But the past week or so we decided to get as much done as possible – new sofa, new patio furniture, new kitchen table, hanging pictures, selecting photos to hang, organising the study/filing etc. Chris has also been batch cooking sauces, chillis, stews etc to fill up our chest freezer. Bless him – he has been amazing at getting things ready because I have been, quite frankly, useless! This is what is called nesting!
Party planning. I am not having a baby shower…but we are having a house, baby and birthday party to celebrate our new home and to enjoy some time with our friends before our family grows into three. Oh and it is Chris’s birthday soon too. So why not have a big bash?

That’s a long post – I’m sorry! But it has been a while and I wanted to capture everything that has happened in the past few weeks. Signing off with a bump pic!