IVF DIARY VOL I: 10 – 16 JULY 2015

July 17, 2015July 17, 20153 Comments

Medication(s) administered and dosage(s). Ovulation Control Pill (OCP) Reclipsen 0.15MG-30MCG x 1

Medical procedures undertaken. Nil

How do I feel today? Fed up of spotting! I haven’t felt ‘hormonal’ the last week like I thought potentially the birth control pills might do. Overall feeling not too bad.

What are my symptoms? The first few days after I started the birth control pills I got a bit bloated and a bit constipated…which for someone with Irritable Bowel Syndrome (The diarrhea type) one would think it would make a nice change from going to poo three times a day! Fortunately, things have got back to normal in that arena. My boobs are a little tender and have stayed the same size since my period started (a bit bigger). Then there is the extra bleeding also, my period lasted a couple of days longer than my normal 2-3 days…and I have been spotting since then, so wearing a panty liner is a must right now.

How does Chris feel today? Chris is still very busy at work at the moment 😦 He is trying to get as much done in prep for the when we start ‘stimming’ (aka injecting the drugs) so he can focus on us. (Aww bless him, he’s a sweetie) We did have that big discussion about how many embryos to transfer and what our decision will be. It made for an interesting dinner table conversation! We weighed up the pros and cons, but he did say that ultimately he would stick with whatever I decided because it is my body and health that would be at risk. So we haven’t completely ruled out transferring two just yet.

Any results? NA

What’s next? Just four more days of birth control pills. I’m looking forward to not hearing my ‘alien’ alarm on my phone that reminds me to take them at the same time every day.

Weight. Funny story and probably too much information – Now, I have been weighing myself as soon as I wake up to make it a fair comparison. One morning, after weighing myself I went downstairs, started to prepare breakfast when I realised I needed to go to the toilet (at last hooray!!). And as I mentioned earlier, having been constipated for a while, I did an enormous poo….so much so that in the interest of science, afterwards, I dashed back upstairs to weigh myself again. Can you believe it? I weighed EXACTLY the same 127.2lbs….and I got on and off I three times to be sure it wasn’t stuck. So now I just don’t trust those scales!!

Waist. NSTR

Boobs. NSTR

Hours of Sunshine 🙂 Seriously, still not enough….the weather has not been great recently, but last night whilst I played softball I soaked up the evening sun and it was glorious. I hope this weekend brings us some better weather!

*Notes. I take First Response Reproductive Health multi vitamin gummies (pre-natal) and CoQ10 200mg gummies daily. NSTR = Nothing Significant To Report.

We have a start date for IVF!

July 9, 20156 Comments

Today the nurse called me with our IVF schedule…wooohooo!

It looks roughly like this:

Our rough schedule

So our first day of stimulation injectibles will be Friday 24 July. Chris and I both go in to the clinic to fill out the rest of the paper work, pay the $$$, get a lesson on how to do injectibles, receive our medication plan and I will have my first monitoring appointment with ultrasound/ blood work.

I also asked the nurse about the vivelle dot (estrogen patches) and why insurance only covers 8 patches and not the whole 24. Apparently the use of the patches is “off label” so it is not covered under infertility coverage, therefore I would need to pay for the rest out of pocket. BUT she did say that usually insurance will cover 8 every 30 days, so I can refill the prescription in 2.5 weeks and the insurance will cover 8 more patches, then I maybe lucky that by the time I need the last 8 it might be another 30 days. But either way, now we know why and will expect to pay out of pocket for the patches if needs be!

So….just another 11 days of Birth Control Pills! I really hope these don’t mess my hormones up too much :-s

IVF Diary Vol I: 04 – 09 July 2015

July 9, 2015Leave a comment

I’m starting my IVF Diary today. I’m going to be tracking a few things about my first IVF experience over the next 6-7 weeks . I’ll be blogging too, but I want to capture the experience like this….in a kind of organised manner, to help give me some sense of control over something, because I fear that I will have to let that go!

Medication(s) administered and dosage(s). Ovulation Control Pill (OCP) Reclipsen 0.15MG-30MCG x 1

Medical procedures undertaken. Nil

How do I feel today? I was feeling grumpy, then a bit teary eyed today. No one asked me if anything was wrong, but I reckon some people probably thought I got out of the wrong side of bed today! Which perhaps I did because it’s the first night I slept all the way through without needing to pee or wake up from night sweats….and then the alarm woke me up and I really didn’t want to get up.

What are my symptoms? It’s period time, so I am bleeding pretty heavily today with some gross and huge clots (sorry if that’s too much info, but this is what this diary will be – blunt and honest! It’s not going to be all fairies and sunshine). I also have normal period pains and feeling of emptiness in my tummy like I want to do a huge fart or burp (It’s the kind of feeling I get when I am really hungry)

How does Chris feel today? Chris is very busy at work at the moment, but when I asked him he how he was feeling, he said he hasn’t thought about IVF today! 🙂

Any results? NA (but the nurse finally told me today that my blood test results for HiV, Hep B, C and Rubella all came back just fine even though I called her last week to check up on them and the results came back 2 weeks ago!)

What’s next? Hoping that my body can handle these Birth Control Pills!

09 July 2015

Weight. NSTR

Waist. NSTR

Boobs. NSTR

Hours of Sunshine 🙂 Not enough….0.25hrs (I walked to the shop)

*Notes. I take First Response Reproductive Health multi vitamin gummies (pre-natal) and CoQ10 200mg gummies daily. NSTR = Nothing Significant To Report.

Double Trouble: options for elective single embryo transfer

July 7, 2015July 7, 20153 Comments

Double trouble can only mean one thing – twins! A couple of weeks ago our friend recently gave birth to two handsome little boys – fraternal twins. I visited them after they were just a few days old, and as I held one of the boys I tried to imagine how it was possible to fit two of these little babies in anyone’s tummy! I know they are curled up pretty tight in there, but seriously – it must be magic! I am so amazed at how my friend carried these two boys to full term and not break her back! I am also super impressed that she avoided a c-section, despite one of her boys being breach – what a super mum (mom). And I am under no false impressions that it was easy! So all this got me thinking about our first IVF cycle and the number of Embryos we will transfer…and our chances of twins.

Now…Chris and I have already discussed and agreed that we are OK with multiples…we had to make that decision when we had our IUIs, in fact for one of my IUIs I had three follicles, so there was always a chance for triplets! Yikes Treble Trouble. But being OK with multiples is not the same as actively desiring multiples. For IUI, it was kind of out of our hands how any eggs would fertilise and implant, it was still very natural. But for IVF, we kind of have a choice. Our clinic typically transfers 2 embryos for women <35 and first round of IVF, but of course, we can choose to just transfer 1.

I read somewhere that 29% of IVF patients said that twins were a desirable outcome. Why? Well it’s kind of like BOGOF (buy one get one free). IVF treatment doesn’t come cheap, both financially and emotionally, so I can understand this logic. But for me this is all about probability and gambling….not with money, but with needles and drugs. Sure it costs $$$$s but fortunately we have it covered by insurance. It’s the emotional and physical cost that I am particularly nervous about. I have no clue what it will be like, so I feel like for our first IVF round we can’t make a firm decision just yet how many embryos we will transfer. I want to wait and see what all these hormones are like first and what our doctor’s prognosis will be when the time comes.

However, that doesn’t stop me looking into it now. Whilst I was surfing the web for more info on this subject I discovered an article that my RE had commented on regarding the a study that had shown single embryo beat double embryo transfer. Her point of view on the study was very vanilla and cautious! Random. I also found that the CDC provide a good little list of things to consider for elective Single Embryo Transfer.

So for now this topic lays to rest until we get a bit closer to transfer day. But until then, I’ll keep educating myself on what it might be like to be a mother of twins as well as help out our friend however we can with their teeny bundles of joy 🙂 So it’s not just double trouble – it’s also double the adorable 🙂

Starting my IVF diary

July 2, 201510 Comments

I have been thinking about writing an “IVF Diary”. Something a bit more formal and structured than my blog. I will of course post my IVF diary on my blog and keep posting other things, but I wanted to create a bit of structure to my diary to help me. Plus, I am all about the data (did I tell you I’m an analyst??!), I can’t help but think of it as s kind of data collection plan. Soooo this is what I think my template will be, but I would really like some input from anyone who has been through this before. I’ve crawled some blogs to try and figure out what would be useful to monitor:

Day X, date, cycle #, cycle type

Medication(s) administered and dosage(s).

Medical procedures undertaken.

How do I feel today? (i.e. my emotions)

What are my symptoms? (i.e. my physical reactions)

How does Chris feel today? (i.e. his emotions, if he is willing to share them that is)

Any results? (i.e. blood tests, ultrasounds)

What’s next? (any thing significant in the next 24-48 hrs)

Weight. (has it changed?)

Waist size. (has it changed?)

Boob size

Temp?? (should I do this or is it pointless because meds screw temps up?)

I want to start this week so I can capture a baseline of some of these stats before I start Birth Control Pills next week, like weight etc.

Do you think I have missed anything???

Pregnancy chances increase among women who soak up sun before IVF treatment

July 2, 20158 Comments

Pregnancy chances increase among women who soak up sun one month before IVF treatment

I was researching my next blog post and accidentally came across this recent headline. Basically, some Belgian researchers discovered that an increased exposure to sunshine one month before conception can increase chances of getting pregnant by IVF by more than a third. WOAH. An increase in chances of a positive outcome by a third? Chris…quick book us a holiday to the Caribbean and let’s hit that beach! Stat!

Well, we do know that melatonin is important in cell development, as well as the importance of Vitamin D, so it does make some sense. So I tried to hunt down the source of this claim. It took me aaaages because the researcher they referenced was not the prime author. Anyway. It seems the researchers from Ghent University have not yet published their findings in a paper, but I did find their poster from the conference, so you can take a look at the results for yourself. Now there are definitely some significant findings there, but as we all know, correlation doesn’t equal causation….but I’m happy to give the sun a go! It’s pretty low risk, doesn’t require giving up anything and who doesn’t love a bit of sun?! Now, I wonder whether the factor of suncream makes a difference…hmmm….

So ladies – we all know about honey moons and baby moons…now we need to make pre-conception moons a thing #preconceptionmoon (I’m sure it will catch on).

No returns policy

July 1, 201513 Comments

There isn’t much I have purchased in life that I have not been allowed to return, with the exception of swim wear, knickers, sale items and earrings. But today I purchased enough medication for our first IVF cycle….and it comes with a big fat no returns policy! There is no turning back now. The whole order cost us $770 (which is the co-pay at 10%, so complete cost of the medication is $7700!! Ouch.) and should arrive in a couple of days. I guess we are really doing this then….

Reflections on the future – using someone else’s ten lessons learned on Infertility

June 28, 2015June 28, 20154 Comments

A friend of mine recently sent me a link to a Huffington Post Article “Ten things I would tell my past self about infertility”, written by Kathryn Kefauver Goldberg (she has written other posts too). Not only was it an interesting article, but my friend told me “I can be your number 9”. Number 9 in the list of ten things was:

9. Find one person to whom you can talk uncensored. Check in with yourself about what and who feels good. This might be a friend, a counselor, a support group — anyone who can support you unconditionally and isn’t invested in the outcome.

Well of course, my friend already is my number 9 🙂 I’ve got this one nailed already! So what about the other 9 suggestions in the list of Ms Goldberg’s lessons learned?

1. Recognise that the limbo of infertility puts you in an impossible situation. This is something we are totally dealing with right now, with the added limbo on whether we stay in the US or move back to Europe. Fortunately, one of those limbos has been taken away – I have been offered an indefinite contract, so I don’t have to leave the US in December! We have choices. But we don’t have choices when it comes to whether we get pregnant or not! So we are handling it OK right now, better than last week. We will just take one to two weeks at a time. It’s pretty hard work on the abdominal muscles all this limbo business, but you get a good work out, and your muscles only get stronger as time goes on.

2. Feeling sadness will not define your path. I have had a pretty tough few weeks on this front, and I have questioned my ability at work, if I am coping. I even asked myself if I was depressed. I don’t believe I am depressed, but just sad. Being sad is OK. How do I know I am not depressed? Well I just googled it, and I am not depressed, I don’t fit the descriptions.

3. Define and honor your limits. Here Ms Goldberg talks about pressure to try everything on the medical front. It can be quiet easy to go far without questioning medical treatment, for example agreeing to ICSI, agreeing to freezing embryos, agreeing to participate in research etc. We have made sure we talk about it together, but I am not sure Chris and I have the same feelings on how far we go on our path. I think I will feel what I will feel, in the future and I can’t predict that right now, so I don’t want to put a maximum number of attempts, money or time on our path.

4. Listen to your doctor and trust your gut. I’m not very good at questioning a doctor, after all they are supposed to be the qualified ones, right? But I do get gut feelings about people and I have a positive gut feeling about our doctor, even if she seems a little crazy sometimes.

5. Have rote answers prepared for nosey questioners. I have talked about this on two occasions recently, but I think it depends on the situation. It’s a careful balance. This week I caught up with some friends I haven’t seen for a year, and I totally lied to them about what we are going through (I didn’t lie directly, I just avoided the opportune moment to talk about it) and I wish I had just been honest because I know they would have been great about it.

6. For every medical procedure you go through, find a soothing activity for your body. Ahhh a couple of massages I think might be scheduled. Maybe we need to think about this more.

7. Take care of your heart. This is more about protecting yourself from emotional overload moments, like going to baby showers. Well I have decided to tackle these head on. Infertility doesn’t define the me and the type of friend I want to be to my friends. I won’t let it, and it’s worked so far. I will take care of my heart, but I know Chris has got me on this one too. He’s like my cod liver oil or what ever is good for your heart – he is my added protection layer for my heart.

8. Invent a project. Well I have decided to take another online course starting in a week. This will be my project. It will be a useful distraction, I hope, rather than be an added stress.

…

10. It will be OK, though your definition of OK will change. I tell myself this a lot. Everything is going to be OK. And if I ever doubt this, all I need to do is listen to Chris’s playlist of movie’s all time greatest dramatic soundtracks, like the one below. And everything is going to be OK again. This is my future.

Last chance saloon…well kind of

June 18, 2015June 18, 2015Leave a comment

Last chance for natural conception

Today it dawned on me that as a result of my last cycle being shorter than expected, I am probably going to be away for a work conference right at peak ovulation time. DOH. This is going to be our last chance to conceive naturally before we start IVF. (Yes I still have hope that we can beat the odds!) Soooo, what’s a girl to do? I’m thinking an ice box and turkey baster will be required. Wait. That’s NOT natural!

I can just hope that I ovulate later than expected or have another short cycle!

OR Chis will just have to drive 4 hrs to DC and stay with me for one night and then get up super early and drive 4 hrs back before work. Ummmm, do you think I will be able to convince him to do it?? I’m pretty sure he will be not be down for that.

Love you honey!!!

Oh well. It will be what it will be. Nature is unpredictable anyway.

Lost blood work frustrations

When I first had all my infertility testing back in December last year, my doctor gave me TWO orders for blood work. The first order was to test my cycle day 3 hormone, FSH LH etc. The second order was to test for baddies that can affect the health of a pregnancy, such as HIV, Hep B & C, syphilis, in addition to having an immunity to Rubella and Chicken Pox (I’ve had these jabs, so I hope I have immunity!!) which are all a legal pre-screening requirement for IVF. I received my results for Day 3 tests, but never saw my results for HIV etc. I just assumed all was good, and never thought anything more of it until…..I met my IVF nurse the other month.

After much hunting, it turns out they never drew blood for my second order. I KNOW I gave them that second order, so I am really annoyed. It was only last month I received the bill for this blood work back in December, so I had no clue they never did the tests. The bill I received for $500 I thought would have covered all these tests. But it turns out it costs over $1000 for both orders of blood work!! So, frustratingly, the nurse had to send me a new order which took almost a week to get to me in the post (I forget how snail snail mail is here, I should have just picked it up from the office).

This time I went directly to the lab who does the analysis rather than to hospital to have my blood drawn.

Now, you would have thought that going straight to the specialists who take blood day in day out would be good at it. But oh no. Not this one. After one vial of blood was collected with the needle still in my army, the nurse was like… “Come on….where did it go? Why is nothing coming out? Hmmm…” as he wiggled the needle and I tried very hard not to shout out ‘OWWWWWWW THAT FRICKING HURTS!!’ Thankfully after what seemed like forever “Oh!! There’s the vein!”. But I won’t be totally mean about this nurse. He was entertaining, and did immediately recognise my accent and asked where in the UK I was from. I congratulated him on his talent for recognising a British accent and we talked about how surprising it is how many people have no clue where I am from. He even understood what I meant when I said “Cheers” as I left. So I’ll let him off the hook.

So after all that, let’s hope I do have immunity to rubella, otherwise I am going to have to wait ANOTHER cycle to start IVF. Now that will make me pretty mad 😐

My new cubicle buddy is actually an IVF angel!

June 16, 20157 Comments

There are some benefits of telling your work colleagues that you are about to go through IVF. My new cubicle buddy told me that she gave injections for her friend going through IVF – so she not only knows all about IVF, but also has the injectible skills! Haha! She kindly offered to give me any of my injections if I needed the assistance. So if we have an emergency like the time Chris had to stab me in his work car park…my cubicle angel will be there for me 🙂 In fact, another friend at work has also offered her assistance too with the injections (she has never given one before, but isn’t squeamish about it like me!). I am loving the love and feel very grateful to be surrounded by such lovely friends 🙂